Paul Calf's Home Page - Bag O' Shite


[ Friends and Family | Philosophy | Quotes | Links ]


Me looking devastatingly handsome "Hello, my name's Paul Calf, support Man City. Like drinking, like a laugh, chat, you know - bit of a debate, argument, scrap, fight, punch up, break some bloke's nose. I like life."

 

 


Friends and Family

Philosophy - my thoughts on life.
Me again
"Having a body that drives women wild is a bit like having a green Ford Cortina mark 4 - you've either got one or you haven't. And I've got one."

"There comes a time when a man has to stand up and say 'Yes I am Paul Calf. I've done some bad things, but if you can't accept me with all my paradox, well I'm sorry. But I make no apologies for that.' All I'm asking for is a little respect."


Quotes
On Paul's Green Ford Cortina Mark 4:
Paul: "That is class. You can't buy class."
Bob: "Where did you get the fog lamps?"
Paul:"Halfords." - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul meets Roland:
Roland: "I'm sorry is there a problem?"
Paul: "I'm sorry is there a problem?"
Roland: "Is there?"
Paul: "Yeah, you!"
Roland: "Why?"
Paul: "You're a student!" - Mp3 sound clip
| Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul to Roland:
"Are you calling my car a queer?" - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul to Roland:
"You say another word, a little word, anything - I'll hit you!" - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul to Roland:
"I should have taken my ring off before I hit you - sorry!"
- Mp3 sound clip
| Send to a friend using mymailvox
Cigarette Lighters and Life:
Paul: "Disposable!"
Roland: "Aren't we all?"
Bob:"You can get refills." - Mp3 sound clip
| Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul to Pauline:
"We could stand around here chatting all day, but er, but we can't." - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul to Pauline:
"Shut up will you!" - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul to Tony:
"Forgive me, but you've got shit shoes on - you shitty shoed bastard!" - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Pauline to Paul:
"If brains were shit you wouldn't have a sniff!"
- Mp3 sound clip
| Send to a friend using mymailvox
Pauline to Paul:
"If you didn't whistle you wouldn't know where to wipe your arse - you daft bastard." - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Tomorrow:
Paul's Mum: "Tomorrow never comes."
Paul: "Yes it does. It did yesterday!" - Mp3 sound clip
| Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul to Bob:
"Come on Bob, let's get pissed!" - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox
Tony to Paul:
"Did no one ever tell you - that you're a twat Paul?"
- Mp3 sound clip
| Send to a friend using mymailvox
Paul about Bob:
"Bob the Blob, fat blobby bastard Bob." - Mp3 sound clip | Send to a friend using mymailvox

Links

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